Not a disorder

We mentioned on the 'What is multiplicity?' page that the mental health people classify multiplicity as either "Dissociative Identity Disorder" or "Multiple Personality Disorder". The word "Disorder" implies that there is something wrong with us, an implication that is as offensive as it is dangerous.

For many of us, our multiplicity is entirely natural and has no obvious "cause" Someone who is naturally multiple could actually be really messed up if they were to be put through the therapy mill. A far better way for them would be to work things out for themselves and try to establish an appropriate level of co-operation / communication in their own time.

Are we a natural multiple? Were we abused? Suffered trauma? We are probably multiple by our nature. Yes, at two years old we did see the family home burn down with our sister inside (She was rescued and is fine). Yes, we were abused by an evil aunt. Yes our primary caregiver was chaotic and made bizarre, sometimes mad decisions.

Despite that we still feel that our multiplicity is most likely to be a natural thing. We really don't fit the stereotypes that you see in the media either (Does anyone really?). We have never woke up in a hotel room on the other side of the country with no idea of who or where we are. We don't have one who smokes. We Have never bought stuff and then had no knowledge of it. We have very rarely done something and not remembered it.

Whatever the causes (Do we really need to know? What difference would it make?) of a groups multiplicity, life can be challenging at times. We are lucky that we cope well for most of the time. We don't cope well with life all of the time, but to be honest who does? It would be unfair to say that we are disordered just because we don't do well every day. Disorganised, occasionally chaotic, but not disordered.

We have a job working as a nurse, which we cope well with. From the point of view of employment and functioning in society, our life is not disordered. We have reasonably good relationships with most of our family and friends, so that is yet another area of life that for us is not disordered. We have a loving and supportive partner of over twelve years- no sign of chaotic relationships!

To be honest, we have more going for us than many people can ever hope for. We are not rich financially but our life is pretty full. For us the experience of being multiple is not one of disorder. Its a life of caring for an inner family which is every bit as loving, perhaps more so, as a regular family external to us.